Why it is hard to make tough decisions


Often, a hard decision requires us to be selfish and disregard the needs of our loved ones. We forget they are being selfish too. Who wins, then? It’s hard to decide.

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The good and the bad; the right and the wrong; they are black and white options. It may seem like one would naturally gravitate towards what is best for us, but really is that so? How often we see people taking decisions that are not in their best interests.
Then, we blame their clouded perspectives for not having discerned the correct choice.
In some cases, it is true. But not in all.
Often, people take the wrong decision despite knowing they are incorrect. They are pressurized by many factors — social, psychological, moral, and many more.
In such cases, people often believe they ‘have no choice’. Of course, that’s not true. People always have a choice, three, in fact: to do something; to do something else, or to not do anything at all.
One or more of these choices are not palatable; not necessarily to the individual specifically, but because they may react explosively with the other factors in life. They are likely to turn your world upside down, create some havoc.
Who wants that? Everyone wants their peace and comfort.
This is why some choices are as good as non-existent for people, because they come at a great cost. You may not be ready to pay this cost for making the right choice.
That doesn’t mean the choice does not exist. It always does. Often, the road to freedom and independence requires grave costs.
Man is bound by his need for social acceptance, which goes against his inherent need for self-preservation. They are afraid of being branded ‘selfish’. Well, some are, if not all.
But, really, is selfishness, in small doses, all that bad?
If I am being selfish because I need a momentary break, for example, isn’t the other party being selfish too in not allowing me my break? Who’s selfishness is more valued, then?
We know ourselves the best, even when we hide the truth from ourselves. We know what is good for us, and what is harmful. We usually do. Fighting for it makes us self-centred. No doubts about that. The motives are selfish.
Yet, they are very much important.
Often, a hard decision requires us to be selfish and disregard the needs of our loved ones. We forget they are being selfish too. Who wins, then? It’s hard to decide.
Eventually, only the strong, the determined and the adamant get their way.

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